Written By: Ibukunoluwa Adelowo
This thing called life. I wish there was a manual to it, like a certified manual that contains all the answers we could ever need. Cause I find myself asking, time and time again, what’s the point to life? I mean, we’re all going to die one day, so what’s the point? Someone said the point is to find your purpose and make an impact in your environment that lives on after you. Did you hear that? After you’re gone, cause you still end up going. So yeah, it’s really great that we mention Steve Jobs once in a while when we remember the history of Apple, but it doesn’t change the fact that he’s dead. Gone. Erased from existence. Just like that. Is that too morbid? Fine, I’ll move to something else.
Theodore Roosevelt once said, comparison is the thief of joy. Do you realize that comparison has been in existence even before Jesus came. You don’t remember? Allow me take you down memory lane. Do you remember the time of Adam and Eve? They had three children, we mostly remember the first two though, Cain and Abel. After the fall of man, the next major sin that was recorded in the bible was caused by comparison, this led to jealousy and then led to murder. Cain and Abel were to offer a sacrifice to God, Abel’s own was more bountiful than Cain’s own, probably because he had more reason to give thanks to God, or he reverenced God more than Cain did, I really don’t know. Cain saw how God was pleased with Abel, and compared it with God’s reaction to his own. Pause. Why did he have to do that? I mean, they obviously put in different efforts, so they were definitely going to get different reactions, but he just had to compare and then he got envious and killed his own brother.
In modern times, it’s a lot easier to sit back and compare our lives to other people’s lives, because nowadays, most of us struggle with a lot of insecurity, times are harder, and the internet is more accessible. So it’s a lot easier to see a picture of Kylie Jenner buying a whole yacht for her birthday while you’re on your bed thinking of the fact that you’re older than her and you don’t even have a wheelbarrow to your name. Damn! That has to hurt. Yeah, she’s younger than you and getting it, good for her. Who is to say you’re not going to get it too someday? Maybe not as big as hers, or maybe even bigger, who knows? Why should it matter? In fact, why is she the yardstick for measurement? I’ll tell you why, because you compared yourself to her, so by doing that you’ve succeeded in making her the standard level for everything you attain in life. So you get a new job, it’s not a big deal to you, because I mean, she has a multi-million dollar company in her name. To someone else who has been jobless for years now, you’ve hit the lottery. Do you see the pattern here? What you have that you’re comparing to what someone else has, someone else is out here comparing it to what they have and wishing they were you, while you’re wishing you were Kylie Jenner, who is probably wishing she was someone else too, I mean I don’t know for sure, we’re not pen pals like that.
People don’t realize how pointless it is to indulge in comparison. Here is why, we all know for a fact that there are no exact same people in this world, even twins, sure they look alike, but they have different genetic makeup, similar but definitely not identical. So why are you comparing yourself with someone entirely different from you? The way I see it, comparison is only fair if we have two exact same people living the exact same life under the exact same circumstances. I don’t think a scenario like that exists, so my dear readers, comparison is pointless and very unnecessary.
Besides the fact that comparison is pointless, let me remind you of my opening sentence where I said it’s the thief of joy. Comparison, in my opinion, feeds off of our insecurity and then leads to self-doubt which can lead to envy and could very possibly lead to death, as seen with Cain and Abel. You feel unsure about your body, you see someone else bold and confident enough to post their body on the internet, you start comparing your body with theirs. If you were confident and proud of your own body, you wouldn’t need to compare your own body with someone else’s own, but because there is already an insecurity concerning your body, the comparison has a ground to build on and affect how you see yourself and even the person you’re comparing yourself with. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying you can’t admire someone’s body and want to make changes to your lifestyle to achieve something like that, you can sure do that. However when you feel insecure about your body, the comparison will make you feel worse and might even drive you to make terrible decisions about yourself with regards to your body.
There is only one you, one me, one Kylie Jenner, one everybody. So, if you want to compare, how about YOU set the yardstick for the comparison for yourself, without any interference from other people, the parameters should be set and decided by you and you alone. If you come to think about it, comparing yourself to someone else is basically handing over your power and control to someone else, cause someone else is influencing and affecting every single decision you make. I don’t know about you but life is too short to give anyone that much control over your life which will then hinder how you live your life. So you have that control, hold it, cherish it, use it and don’t ever think of giving it to anyone.
